{"id":2212,"date":"2013-07-03T06:33:34","date_gmt":"2013-07-03T06:33:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.fullofcrow.com\/poetry\/?page_id=2212"},"modified":"2013-07-03T06:33:34","modified_gmt":"2013-07-03T06:33:34","slug":"donal-mahoney-july-2013","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.fullofcrow.com\/poetry\/archives\/donal-mahoney-july-2013\/","title":{"rendered":"Donal Mahoney, July 2013"},"content":{"rendered":"

Strangers in Peoria<\/strong>
\nI met a proper woman in a proper pub
\non a Monday in Peoria. I was taken by how much
\nshe looked like Jackie after Dallas
\nbut without the pillbox hat.<\/p>\n

She was from New York and I was from Chicago
\nand we were in Peoria for interviews
\nfor jobs we thought we’d get.
\nBut living in Peoria, we thought,
\nmight not be a fit.<\/p>\n

The lady was a surgeon recruited by a hospital.
\nIt took a little prompting but finally she said:
\n“I repair pelvic floors in women.”
\nShe paused to see if I’d react
\nand when I didn’t, she continued.<\/p>\n

“If a bladder drops, or a rectum tumbles
\nor if a womb is full of fibroids,
\nI’m the surgeon that lady needs to see.
\nThese are ailments most men never
\nhear about unless they’ve had a wife
\nwho’s had them.”<\/p>\n

She sipped her Coke,
\ndabbed the corner of her mouth,
\nand then assured me:
\n“When I get done, the lady’s free
\nof all protrusions. She can urinate,
\ndefecate and have sex again, all
\nwithout discomfort.”<\/p>\n

Now I\u2019ve met my share of women,
\nbut I had never met a woman,
\ndrunk or sober, quite like her.
\nI had no idea what to say and so
\nI sat and listened.<\/p>\n

“Actually, my patients have a choice.
\nThey can let me do the surgery or buy
\na pessary, a device few women know about
\nuntil I pull one from the cabinet
\nand explain its ins and outs.
\nThe pessary makes surgery seem simple
\nand so we pick a day for me to tuck
\nthe organs back where they belong.<\/p>\n

“Now, if the womb is full of fibroids,
\nI’ll suggest that we remove the uterus as well.
\nI tell her we’ll take out her crib
\nand leave her playpen intact.
\nOften that’s the best solution.”<\/p>\n

She sipped her Coke again and said,
\n“Somewhere in Peoria, as we speak,
\na bladder’s dropping, a rectum’s quivering
\nand a fibroid’s growing. Believe me,
\nif the salary is right, I’ll take this job
\nbecause a fibroid in Peoria’s no different
\nthan a fibroid in New York.”<\/p>\n

Then she put me on the spot:
\n“Well, that’s my story. What’s yours?
\nWhat do you do for a living?”<\/p>\n

I took a breath and said:
\n“I repair sentences in documents
\nwritten by intelligent people
\nexpert in arcane fields.
\nSome of them can’t spell
\nor punctuate or if they can,
\nthey dangle participles,
\nsplit infinitives or run
\ntheir sentences together
\nlike mountain rams
\nin rutting season.”<\/p>\n

For emphasis I added,
\n“I put muscle in their verbs,
\namputate their adjectives,
\nassassinate their adverbs.
\nI give my clients final copy
\nthey can claim is theirs.
\nThe reader never knows
\na ferret like me has dashed
\nbetween the lines,
\nnibbling at this
\nand chomping on that.”<\/p>\n

Then I added a remark I hoped
\nwould prompt a get-together later
\nfor dinner and drinks,
\nanother chat and a little laughter,
\nwho knows what else,
\nbefore we’d have to take
\ndifferent planes back home:<\/p>\n

“I believe our work is similar,” I said.
\n“I too put things back where they belong
\nand cut away anything protruding.”<\/p>\n

About an hour later, we paid our tabs,
\nsaid long good-byes and headed off
\nin different directions. By day’s end,
\nwe’d both be flying home;
\nand although we’d still be strangers,
\nwe’d be strangers who had had
\nan interesting conversation.<\/p>\n

Not interesting enough, however,
\nfor either of us to ask
\nthe other for a name or number.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Nominated for Best of the Net and Pushcart prizes, Donal Mahoney has had poetry and fiction published in a variety of print and electronic publications in North America, Europe, Asia and Africa. Some of his work can be found at http:\/\/eyeonlifemag.com\/the-poetry-locksmith\/donal-mahoney-poet.html<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Strangers in Peoria I met a proper woman in a proper pub on a Monday in Peoria. I was taken by how much she looked like Jackie after Dallas but without the pillbox hat. She was from New York and I was from Chicago and we were in Peoria for interviews for jobs we thought […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":934,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-2212","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"yoast_head":"\nDonal Mahoney, July 2013 - Full Of Crow: Poetry (Archives)<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.fullofcrow.com\/poetry\/archives\/donal-mahoney-july-2013\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Donal Mahoney, July 2013 - Full Of Crow: Poetry (Archives)\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Strangers in Peoria I met a proper woman in a proper pub on a Monday in Peoria. 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